100+ Valentines Day Funny Quotes & Sayings 2022

Valentine’s Day is a day to celebrate love, but what about the laughs? We have compiled some of the funniest Valentine’s Day quotes, sayings, and jokes that you can share on your social media or with your friends on this special day. When it comes to Valentine’s Day humor, there is something for everyone.

Valentines Day Funny Quotes 2022

  • “My friends tell me I have an intimacy problem. But they don’t really know me.”
  • “There are only three things women need in life: food, water, and compliments.”
  • “By all means marry. If you get a good wife, you’ll be happy. If you get a bad one, you’ll become a philosopher.”
  • “Love is an hourglass, with the heart filling up as the brain empties.”
Valentines Day Quotes Funny
Valentines Day Quotes Funny
Valentines Day Quotes Funny
Valentines Day Quotes Funny
  • “People who throw kisses are hopelessly lazy.”
  • “Love: A temporary insanity curable by marriage.”
  • “Love thy neighbor—and if he happens to be tall, debonair and devastating, it will be that much easier.”
  • “Love can change a person the way a parent can change a baby—awkwardly, and often with a great deal of mess.”
See also  100+ Anti-Valentines Day Quotes for Who Doesn't Like the Day
Valentines Day Quotes Funny
Valentines Day Quotes Funny
Valentines Day Quotes Funny
Valentines Day Quotes Funny
Valentines Day Quotes Funny
  • Love is a fire. But whether it is going to warm your hearth or burn down your house, you can never tell.”
  • “If you love them in the morning with their eyes full of crust; if you love them at night with their hair full of rollers, chances are, you’re in love.
  • “I was married by a judge. I should’ve asked for a jury.”
  • “As a man in a relationship, you have two choices: You can be right, or you can be happy.”
Valentines Day Quotes Funny
Valentines Day Quotes Funny
Valentines Day Quotes Funny
Valentines Day Quotes Funny
Valentines Day Quotes Funny
  • “You can’t buy love, but you can pay heavily for it.”
  • “If love is the answer, can you please rephrase the question?”
  • “Oh, here’s an idea: Let’s make pictures of our internal organs and give them to other people we love on Valentine’s Day. That’s not weird at all.”
  • “Love is an exploding cigar we willingly smoke.”
Valentines Day Quotes Funny
Valentines Day Quotes Funny
Valentines Day Quotes Funny
Valentines Day Quotes Funny
Valentines Day Quotes Funny

Valentines Day Funny Sayings 2022

  • You are never alone on Valentine’s Day if you’re near a lake and have bread.”
    “Love is being stupid together.”
  • “Honesty is the key to a relationship. If you can fake that, you’re in.”
  • “I love you no matter what you do, but do you have to do so much of it?”
  • “So you see, my son, there is a very fine line between love and nausea.”
    “You may marry the man of your dreams, ladies, but fourteen years later you’re married to a couch that burps.”
See also  100+ Happy Valentines Day Quotes & Sayings 2022
Valentines Day Quotes Funny
Valentines Day Quotes Funny
Valentines Day Quotes Funny
Valentines Day Quotes Funny
  • I love you, not because of what you are, but for what I have become when I am with you. Best wishes on this wonderful day.
  • “I have no notion of loving people by halves, it is not my nature.” — Jane Austen
  • “To be brave is to love unconditionally without expecting anything in return.” — Madonna
  • “Wherever you are, be happy. This is my wish for you.” — Unknown
  • “Anyone can catch your eye, but it takes someone special to catch your heart.” — Unknown
Valentines Day Quotes Funny
Valentines Day Quotes Funny
Valentines Day Quotes Funny
Valentines Day Quotes Funny
Valentines Day Quotes Funny
  • “Valentine’s Day is a love-note to the rest of the year. Graciously, it comes at a perfect time to be savored – that period of calm between winter holiday commotion and spring enticements.” — Jo Lightfoot
  • “At the touch of love everyone becomes a poet.” — Plato
  • “Love is friendship that has caught fire.” — Ann Landers
  • “Love recognizes no barriers. It jumps hurdles, leaps fences, penetrates walls to arrive at its destination full of hope.” — Maya Angelou
See also  100+ Happy Valentines Day Quotes & Sayings for Him 2022
Valentines Day Quotes Funny
  • “We’re lovers and companions, best friends and partners too. More and more, with every Valentine, joy, for me, is loving you.” — Unknown
  • “If I had a flower for every time I thought of you … I could walk through my garden forever.” — Alfred Tennyson
  • “To love another person is to see the face of God.” — Les Miserables
  • “Trip over love, you can get up. Fall in love and you fall forever.” — Unknown

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